I had to do this essay, and its "Is is more valuable for people to fit n that to be unique and different" Just type anything I should fix in red. Scion also helped me in one of my sentences

If everyone tried to fit in with each other, everyone would be afraid to express their true personality. Fitting in with a group is difficult because opinions differ on a subject, and others represent a different way of thinking. Albert Einstein was considered mentally retarded by many, but he was actually thinking why people do certain things. If someone tries to fit in with a group that is completely different, it would result in making odd conversation that really has no opinion. If a different opinion is shown in that group, chances are they would neglect it, and move on to a different subject.

In 4th grade, I got a new jacket that I absolutely loved, but everyone else didn’t like it, and would make fun of it. Instead of following my heart and thinking about what makes me happy, I listened to everyone else and stopped wearing it. This shows how others can diminish what someone cares for. If I decided to continue to wear it, then everyone would learn to accept it, rather than making fun of me for it. Through this event, realized that even though you may like something that fits your taste and personality, it may not be the same way in another persons eyes.

Fixing up a car is also a challenge. You can fix it to what looks appealing to you, but the rest of the crowd may view it from a different prospective. They might view some aspects of it fine, but they may hate others. This shows how people can appreciate certain parts of something, but may hate others. They may share some interests, but not the complete package as it was intended to be looked at.

Overall, it is better to be unique and do what you want, and have others live with the difference in your personal style. Letting peer pressure go over your life you lead to not being individual, and everyone would be almost exactly alike. The world is truly united by individuality.

-tC x3

 

If every person tried to fit in with another person, everyone would be afraid to express their true personality. Fitting in with a group is difficult because the majority of peoples opinions differ from each other. [new sentence, remove the and] The opinions of others represent a different way of thinking. Albert Einstein was considered mentally challenged by many, but he was actually thinking about why people do certain things. If someone would try to fit in with a group that is completely different, the end result would be an odd conversation that really had no opinion. If a different opinion is shown in said group, chances are they would neglect it, and move on to a different subject.

In 4th grade, I got a new jacket that I absolutely loved; however everyone else didn’t like it; they would make fun of it. Instead of following my heart and thinking about what makes me happy, I listened to everyone else and stopped wearing it. This shows how others can influence what people care about. If I decided to continue wearing it, then everyone would learn to accept it. [remove "rather than making fun of me for it"] Through this event, I learned to realize that even though you may like something that fits your taste and personality, others may not feel the same way.

Modifying a vehicle is also a challenge. You can modify it to what looks appealing to you, but the rest of the crowd may view it from a different prospective. They may view some aspects of it positively, but they may hate others. This shows how people can appreciate certain parts of something, but may dislike others. They may share some interests, but not the complete package as it was intended to be looked at.

Overall, it is better to be unique and do what you want, and have others live with the difference in your personal style. Allowing peer pressure to take over the life you lead would in turn cause you not to be an individual. Everyone would be almost exactly alike. The world is truly united by individuality.






You're welcome little man, but I think you're sleeping so I hope this isn't due tomorrow. You need to work on your sentence structures & grammar cuz you have run on sentences galore!

If you don't wanna use a period, use a semicolon. I didn't do a very good job at fixing that but I did try & change the words so they flowed a little better.

 

don't use slang like 'fix up'. ruins your ethos.
"Fitting in with a group is difficult because opinions differ on a subject, and others who is others referring to? represent a different way of thinking."
"They might view some aspects of it fine, but they may hate others. This shows how people can appreciate certain parts of something, but may hate others. They may share some interests, but not the complete package as it was intended to be looked at. " awkward
i'm not gona read any closer cuz i just spent the day writing my paper, so if i read any more words, i think i'll hurl.

 

ty tina!
i owe you one