C'mon people we all have done something or know someone that did something really dumb and funny while drinking. I wanna hear the funniest stories and i'll def jump in to add my own from time to time.

 

Ex or current military would laugh at this..

Ehh.. why not. Here we go ladies and gents.. take a seat.. take a seat.. So.. This one time.. in the Army..

Some of my buddies and I decided that we were going to goto Savannah for the night and hit up the usual Thursday hot spot.. Cavaliers. It was ladies night and I was amped. I was 19 or 20 at the time.. I think 19.. anyway.. aside from drinking.. I figured it would be one of those nights were I would wake up, if I slept and decide that I wasn't able to get out of bed for formation. So we get to the club.. already tipsy.. we did other stuff too, not just drinking.. Club is already packed.. walk in the door and you got the drunk art school girl and her best friend hangin off your jock cause your Army and stacked with cash.. lookin for a good time. My buddy had been stationed at Hunter Army Airfeild in Savannah for a while because he popped hot on a ____ test.. so he knew some people. They all met us that night, and we probally had a crowd of around 25 soldiers.

As the night went on.. so did the possibility of being able to drive sober or find someone to do it for me. I dont know what time it was.. but I knew that my buddy and I had been hitting on this one soldier that he knew from Hunter.. very cute (I think.. damn beer) My buddy and I were infamous for getting all the hot girls to do stupid things on camera or just with us.. this one was no different. She had duty the next morning and couldn't stay out much longer.. it was probally like 2:30am or so.. so she left.. the club slowly started clearing out.. and it started to drizzle.. I had a 93' Ford Ranger, slammed, system, kit'd up, etc... We both decided that we were going to goto Hunter for the night and crash with the one chick from the club. So we did.. we got into my truck.. made a right hand turn onto Abercorn.. then it hit me.. I was drunk as hell.. driving without my licence on me.. underage.. expired tags.. and a whole bunch of other things that if I got pulled over.. I would be toast.. so I hit the intersection.. and wouldn't you know it...

Ssssssssssssssssssreeeeech!

My dumb **** was going way to fast.. fishtailed my truck around in the intersection and started heading the opposite way from which we had came.. Wouldn't you also know it that a damn cop had been sitting in the Piggly Wiggly parking lot and witnessed the whole thing.. Ooops.. my buddy rolled the window down and started to yell.. you cant get us copper!.. at this point it had hit me like a ton of bricks.. if I got stopped.. i'm through. So what does the underage, drunk and idiotic soldier like myself do.. cut the lights on the truck, tighten the seatbelt down.. and haul ****! HAAF was only about 4 or 5 lights up off the main strip and another light down after that.. Here I am.. in my 93' Ranger.. forgot to mention.. I did a engine swap with a new 305.. The roll of my 40-series flowmasters ripped.. I was actually out-running a cop.. WTF! Long story short.. I made it to the base.. and out of his sight jus in time. At this point.. I was sober.. We got onto base and headed for the barracks. We went to the girls room.. she was asleep, but her door was unlocked.. We walked in and woke her up.. needless to say... what happend in that room is rated XXX.. but.. what topped the whole night off..

I woke up the next morning.. first thoughts were..

Wow.. my head...

Wow.. i'm naked...

Wow.. i'm in a dark **** room...

Umm... Wow... where are my cloths?

So I get up.. wrap the sleeping bag around me, flick the light.. and realize that I am inside of a cleaning closet... WTF... I have no clue where I am.. where my cloths are.. or how the hell I got into the closet..

I open the door and the NCO that was on duty asked me.. "you ok brotha?".. I laughed.. I said "where the f**k am I?".. he said Hunter.. I was shocked..

I asked him if he knew why I was in the cleaning closet.. he said I come running up the stairs, **** naked and talking about I needed a room. He said I walked up to the desk and told him that I was from Ft. Stewart, that I was here temporarily, and this is where they put me.. Guess he didn't find that hard to do.. he let me in the closet.. and bam.. passed out..

That is just one of the many I could ammuse you all with.. that is one of the most memorable though..

Next!

 

oh wow, that's a very interesting story. Are u sure the girl in the room wasn't a mop head that you got XXX with?....lol

 

Oh I'm sure.. I actually can rewind right now.. I mean.. yeah.. it was a girl

 

*bump*

 

ok pretty funny.

me and about 4 friends had just turned 21. one of whiched turned 21 about the time we hit the bar. so any way i was driving my friends 72 chevelle to the bar as my car was not much to look at and was having engine problems. anyway we knew 3 out of 5 of the bar tenders at this club. so drinks were either free or half price. so at 2am we closed down the bar and my friends were completely smashed. so on the way home i thought hhuh wonder if i can make them hurl...lol found a very open parking lot and twisted the wheels hit the gas and did i would say about 40 or so spins before one of them said i need to hurl. he hangs his head out the window and you would of though he was the exorsist. so after my bit of fun i realize that i was the only sober one in the car.

So on the way to drop off the first friend. i get pulled over for a tail light that was flickering had to do the walk the line ordeal and the cop asked me how much i had been drinking. told him a few spaced over 3 hours. so i get passed all the test and the cop thanks me for being the driver and not drunk driving. so i get to my friends house. now his driveway had a big treewith about a 3 foot tall bush on each side of it. so i park the car just the bumper touching the bush hold the throttle about half way scream OH (another word of poop). all three of them wake up fly out of the chevelle and hit the ground. mean while in the drivers seat i am laughing my ___ off. so i help the other two back into the car and head for the next person house. after dropping off the next guy i go to my apartment and park the car. my last friend said he needed to drive home. i tell him i am not going to give him the keys to his car till he can prove he is not drunk. so he make and attempt at walking and failed. so he gets ____ed off and them said fine i am walking home and going to report the car stolen. he leaves on foot and 2 hours later i get a call from him saying he got a DUI. i run out to check on the chevelle with my cordless. car is still in the same spot. so i ask to talk to an officer.

ok here is the part where my friend will never be let off of this event ever. the officer tells me he was given a DUI ridding on the wrong side of the road and drunk in public. then he starts laughing. turns out my friend got tired of walking and found a tricycle. now he would of gotten off easy with a dont do that. but he tried to get away on said tricycle and that is where the DUI and other stuff came into play. i was told i can pick him up at anytime. since it was an actual DUI.

Judge dismissed all charges when he went into court and yes the judge laughed at the case as well

 

Well I had a good time with this, but Im not sure about the other person...We both got drunk and decided it would be fun to fight. Well I ended up breaking his nose and giving him 2 black eyes, and one eye swelled to the size of a grapefruit

 

*Bump*

 

hahaha wow these are pretty funny stories so what's your story frday13?

 

Wow I have alot of them actually lol. We were in the twin cities one time and we started drinkin at this place called 7 corners which is actually 4 bars on different corners...I don't get it either. We kept drinkin and my buddy wanted to go to this club and none of us wanted to go. Well he kept harpin and harpin so we gave in and went. Well the drinks never stopped flowing and we were dancing and having fun. Well I pretty much black out at this point and am in auto-pilot. I walk out the club and am hungry and low and behold there is a BK kiddie corner to the club. I walk over its like 1am or so and they are closed except drive through. So I try to get them to open and they wont do it so I get lil upset bangin on the door, I have my white out contacts in also so I'm prob pretty scary. Needless to say cops are called I'm cuffed thrown in back of car and my buddies are pleading to let me go. The nice folks at Bk don't press charges and I'm released. That is the last time I got that drunk lol. Anyone top that?

 

Mine will have to wait till I get home and have a solid 30 minutes to type them out... dont have that luxury at werk

 

I don't drink, but I think I might have to start. These stories make me rofl

 

Alright I got one that everyone still laughs at me about. About two or a little more then two years ago back in new york. It was one of my close friends birthday, so he invited me and a few friends out. We went out to Hoboken NJ because they have dollar pints during the week. So yeah this was a thursday night afterwork. It was a cool little spot and I dropped like $100 and then we went out and got something to eat which was no joke down the street but it felt like I was walking forever!!!!!! So I was a little tipsy I ended up paying for everyones food I dropped like $50 or $60 which no worries but after we ate it was back to the bar. I spent another $100 and then I took off back to the city since I had to work the next day. It was great. But I broke the seal so on the train ride home I had to take a ____. I was somewhere in queens and I got off the train and I got in between two train cars and I started to pee and like a min later the train starts moving so I was still peeing and then one car passes me and out of nowhere this train conductor pops his head out and I was freaked out but I didn't stop I had to pee really bad so once I was done I had to wait for like 20mins before the next train came and I still don't remember when I got home or how I made it. But it was a great night like many others!

 

I was at a house party my sophomore year of college. This guy who my roommate and I were pretty tight with owned the house and was notorious for these huge parties. Anyway, there was this freshman was a total peckerhead... like made up the most bogus strories (which annoys...well... EVERYONE). He was just irritating.

So this kid was NEVER invited to these parties. Well one night the party was in full swing and all of a sudden he walks in the door. Brian - the guy that owned the house, goes over and goes "What the hell are you doing in my house?" The kid turns WHITE and is all "uhhh uhhh well uhhh". So a bunch of people start chanting "LET HIM DRINK". So Brian goes "sure, you can stay here, but what did you bring?" The kid goes "So-Co". Brian takes the bottle and passes it around and EVERYONE takes a pull - or 2 or 3 - off it. It makes it around most of the house before it gets back to him, and there is about an inch left in the bottle.

HILARIOUS! I was okay with the kid, but you don't just SHOW UP to someone's house expecting a warm welcome.



Another one that happened to my ex:
This fight starts to break out and this guy in a white beater throws a few punches, knocks a girl to the ground, and takes off running when they hear sirens. Apparently the neighbors called the cops? But yeah, the cops come up to the girls throwing the party and ask about it. The girls give a description and one asked what he was wearing. The other cop goes "a wife beater". hehe.

 

Meh, I guess I have some time right now... so Ill share the story of the 4th of july...

Im out at Jason "HatenFate"s house out near BFE. Its not in BFE, you actually have to go through BFE to get there, if you get my drift... We are lighting off some fireworks, knocking back a few cold ones, and just having a good old time out by a nice big fire... A chevy van drives by in front of the house, stops, shuts its lights off, and just sits there... after about 5 minutes the van starts up and pulls about a quarter mile down the road and into the neighbors drive. and did the exact same thing... at this point in time it is suggested that we see wtf is going on, since this small town has no police force, so bring into the picture, the dear slayer... an early 90s ford taurus station wagon that has been cut up, is equiped with off road lights, a grille guard, and is 110% badass, pretty much, if Chuck Norris was a vehicle, he would be this one... so three of us jump into this car, myself through the passenger window, Scott through the drivers window, and Alex jumps into the back. we took off down the road and pulled up to the van, a guy stumbles out of the back of the van a little drunker than us, and looks right at me, the conversation is as follows

Me-Anything we can help you with?
Him-Im just lost, Im gonna try to sleep it off and give another stab at it
Me-You better get unlost real quick...

As I said that, he looks into the back of the vehicle, where Alex is sitting, and sees that Alex is petting a stuffed deer head that is in the back of teh vehicle, his mouth just drops to the floor, and he mutters "whatever you say" We whip a real quick u-turn in the car and head back to Jasons with enough time to park and watch this van go speeding past us, on his way back to where he came from.

 

hahaha nice

 

lol.. some mad funny stories..

 

Yup so where is your story guru44?

 

haha, I don't really have anything too ridiculous. Going to school for engineering kind of limited my alcohol consumption lol... But what I will say is that if you ever wanna really party it up then go to Oasis Cancun. It's an all inclusive college resort that I paid I think less the $800 for a whole week and there is more tequilla and corona than you could possibly imagine. Let's just say that hanging out on the beach with a girl you met a club will almost get you arrested in Cancun lol..

 

Ahhh I forgot about my vaca until you mentioned Cancun!

I went to Nassau, Bahamas after my freshman year of college with a bunch of friends. We went on a booze cruise - I think it was something like $30-40 and you got all the alcohol you could drink for 4 hours. Down there, they make rum, and they mix them reaaaaly stiff - we're talking a 5-1 ratio.
So anyway there's 20 or so of us on this cruise. They pick us up and take us back to the hotel on these super compact buses that seat 20 people (4 rows of 5). So I had a pretty high tolerance level back then because I was at parties at least once a week. I'm putting them back and at the end, the bus takes us back to the hotel. However, they drive like friggin' maniacs and the roads are REALLY narrow and crazy bumpy. Not good for a drunk girl. I get stuck in the 3rd row, smack dab in the middle seat of the bus. We're all bouncing around and I have my eyes closed. All of a sudden we hit a big bump, and I vomit on my good friend Eric right in front of me. All down his back and on my white tank top. 2 of my friends had to hold me up so I could get upstairs and help undress me. I slept it off. No hangover.

Super humiliating!!!