randomsuper

i think this whole thing veered in the wrong direction. it's not a sob story. i just think she overreacted and what she said bugs me more than the fact that she left.

rallying_the_scion

hum...i got dumped for no reason, went to basic training, was to get married out of basic training, 3 weeks in to BMT, no more letter, 3 weeks from geting married, got to USAF tech school, get a letter in the mail......and had no reason, to this day, no reason why, and she hates me for no reason....you explain that!!!!! but hey, for the better right....you did the right thing!!!!

doctorcue

You are ok man. Geez... this world is full of different people... some can't see that. If you didn't feel like saying it good for you.

Honestly, I feel that one day you will feel that way. When it comes you'll know it. Until then, there is nothing wrong with just having fun and having companionship.

Go out tonight and kick it with your crew. Life is too short to worry about something small like this. Rock on man!

jct

lifes not short, you have your whole like ahead of you live it up but its not short

cessblood

The same thing happen to me Flecs. 4 years my ex-girlfriend and I broke up cause of something stupid.

randomsuper I'm sorry to hear that. Stay stronge man.

web

Original poster:

If you not saying you loved her made her leave, then there really wasn't anything than a one-sided enfatuation on her part. You did like her and I'm sure, although you say you're a lump, you still showed her sometimes...right?

No one on here can tell you how you SHOULD act or SHOULD react to this b/c it's all about you right now. Honestly, if a girl dumps you after 4 months b/c you won't say "I love you," she's got more issues she's dealing with than you want to even take on.

I was lucky with my gf and I felt love for her immediately. I told her I loved her within 2 months of being with her. We spent a lot of time together and we were very open with one another from day 1. We knew everything about each other's past b/c we didn't want to lie to each other or keep anything from one another.

It's just the way you, as a person, are. If you are a person that isn't really open with your feelings, she should have known that within the first month or 2. If she neglected to pay attention to that and thought that telling you she loved you would change you, that's her mistake. You can't push love, although it seems convenient at the time to say it. You shouldn't get hurt by someone not saying "I love you" back, especially in that short amount of time. Time isn't the major factor when it comes to loving someone but, if during the time you did spend with them you really never learned much about them and still were searching for those certain qualities that would keep your attracted to them, it is still something to consider. You don't want to jump in head first all the time b/c yes..."it is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all" BUT....that love has to be reciprocated both ways for it to be anything meaningful.

I agree that you should have fun with lots of people and do your thing (whatever that may be), but if you find a girl that you truely like, that girl would have qualities that you could enjoy for a long time...i.e..marry in the long run.............Maybe that's a bit forward but, if you can find somethings in the one you are with that continually make you happy and make you want to stay with that person, the relationship itself will become stronger and the understanding of each other's feelings will be more vivid and open.

seattledave

this is close to how i think, I don't think you're going to fall in love after 4 months, if after that 4 months you are not at all in love. Some people get a vibe, maybe the gf did and the poster didn't. He was content being with someone and not feeling any love after being with her for 4 months(I personally think it's a waste of time. It doesn't have to be love at first sight, but damn, being together and talking everyday for 4 months and not feeling it, one way or another?)

web

Well, age also has a huge factor to play in love as well. People may not agree but here me out:

This is no cut to the original poster b/c I don't know his age but, younger people (<21) I feel should experience all different sorts of relationships. Good/mild/bad.....running the gammet while you're young gives you a heads up of what to look for in the girl later on that you plan to marry.

I'm not saying aimlessly dating any and all girls is best, but being able to have a few relationships (somewhat meaningful would be best), will help you out in the long run.

seattledave

i was just as in love with a girl at 15, as I was 19, as I am at 27. (I have a son now, so that love, for me, trumps "relationship" love)

maybe now i'm more responsible with how I treat someone I love, but you can do the whole love with every piece of your heart at just abuot any age. It's just how you're brought up.

tC4italy

I hope for yr sake that was a joke.

Anyway. My now ex-bf told me he loved me after what 2 weeks of dating (3 months after first meeting each other). I told him I couldn't say those words yet. He respected that and said he needed to tell me how he felt. 3 months after that I was totally lost in love and said those words.

But some ppl need to hear them, can't wait. Need reassurance probably.

seattledave

Have you ever thought, that's the easiest way to get a girl you don't respect to sleep with you?

tC4italy

Have you ever thought that you don't know everyone's story?

We were together for over a year. And I have a policy about not sleeping with bfs before a certain period of time.

randomsuper

well, i'm 25 and am generally a relationship person. i'm not a huge fan of casual dating and mixing it up with lots of different girls. not my style. but, i am definately reserved in my emotions when it comes to the opposite sex. i'm not shy or afraid of rejection or anything like that, but i move slow because i wouldn't want to rush into something with someone i'm not sure i'll want to stay involved with farther on down the road.

again, i don't really care that she left. i wasn't planning a wedding anytime soon. i don't know if anyone has ever told you something that just kind of made you wonder about your actions and attitude and whether your behavior is a little off. i just posted this on here to see if anyone else thought that her reaction and reasoning was bizarre. i still feel it was unfair to bounce, but whatever. everyone is replaceable.

tC4italy

Oh and he wasn't american. So those words meant more and without a underlying scope to it.

seattledave

that should be in the stereotype thread.

tC4italy

it came from my american friends experiences rofl

but it proves my point since that's what YOU thought immediatly

web

I told my girlfriend I loved her in Italian.......i thought she wouldn't be able to guess....but, little did i know she took 6 years of spanish


hahahahaha............she just looked at me, smiled and said "I love you too" in English........hahahaha, i was shocked!

tC4italy

che figata :D

Must have shocked you quite a bit eh

web

Era una sorpresa pero uno sorpresa molto bella.................lo portata fuori a mangiare dope e lo deto dinuovo.................lei me bagiato molto quela cera


All that right?

tC4italy

Almost:
Era una sorpresa pero' una sorpresa molto bella. L'ho portata fuori a mangiare e dopo gliel' ho detto di nuovo..lei mi ha baciato molto quella sera ;)