ATM Instructions

A sign in the Bank Lobby reads: "Please note that this Bank is installing
new Drive-through teller machines enabling customers to withdraw cash
without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are
requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their
accounts.
"After months of careful research, MALE &FEMALE procedures have been
developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."

MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.

***********************************************************

FEMALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the
machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive
distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the
inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of
checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot
provided.
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.

 

hahahahaha

 

dang thats the honest truth!!! i hate when ppl just sit there at the atm and push buttons for 45 minutes. its wtf are they doing over there get your money and go for petes sake dang!!!

 

bump since its so funny yet true

 

Oh that's so true sometimes... *sigh*

Reminds me of a gal I used to work with when I was still an engineer.

Here's Brandi's story: http://www.tijil.org/blog/?p=15

 

LOL. How true, how true.

 

HAHA! So true. I always get behind the person who is trying to refinance their mortgage at the ATM.

 

^^ This is funny.. On wed I went to the bank to get out some money and there where these 2 women (I will leave out their nationalities to keep it friendly) in front of me at the atm. 1 lady was actually showing the other lady how to use the atm. The lady being taught kept trying to hit "enter" and then her pin number.. I stood there in dismay shaking my head while looking at the floor...

 

lol....so sad, but so true

 

Wow that "Brani" chic was something else. Just wondering, you mentioned she had kids, did she happen to be married also? It would take some kind of man to deal with that.

 

Lovely gal, but divorced (in about 1991), Aaron. She and her son moved to the Denver area in 1994. Hubby is still up here.