...my girlfriend and a crappy day...
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You need to seriously evaluate what is truly important to now and your future. It is REALLY unfortunate that she is pregnant. I would have some sympathy with her condition and all, but your posts say that she was like this even before she was pregnant. From what I have read she is a manipulative (insert bad female word of your choice here) and she will be as cruel and horrible as possible to get what she wants no matter how or who she hurts in the process. What you need to decide is either sacrifice everything about you for your child (I emphasize child here b/c if you decide to stay with her it should solely be for your child b/c you deserve better than her) or you could separate from her and live with the b.s. that she is going to spread about you and possibly prevent you from seeing your child down the road. You need to come to the realization that there is no reasoning with her. She obviously has major issues and will do anything to get what she wants. I know this a bad thing to say but I honestly think the best thing to happen for you is if she has a miscarriage. If that does happen, please take mine and a few of the other members advice and leave her. I'm not going to tell you to leave her now b/c she is in fact pregnant and I know first hand how much it sucks growing up in a single parent home (mine divorced when I was 5). This is not going to be an easy decision but please, take your time and think about everything in order to make the best decision whether it be for you or your child.
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^ just for clarification, so you're telling me i should stick around at the moment because she is pregnant?
yea, i don't want my future child to have to grow up in a single parent environment. i haven't gotten engaged let alone married to her because of what i see from her now. her parents were mad that i didn't want to marry yet and told her to get an abortion immediately. but she wanted to keep the baby.
i've talked to her about our relationship and both agreed to try to work things out. right now she's mad cause i haven't moved in with her to take care of her.
don't get me wrong, things were great before it happened which is why i never left. no worries or anything. we were honestly both happy with each other.
yea, i don't want my future child to have to grow up in a single parent environment. i haven't gotten engaged let alone married to her because of what i see from her now. her parents were mad that i didn't want to marry yet and told her to get an abortion immediately. but she wanted to keep the baby.
i've talked to her about our relationship and both agreed to try to work things out. right now she's mad cause i haven't moved in with her to take care of her.
don't get me wrong, things were great before it happened which is why i never left. no worries or anything. we were honestly both happy with each other.
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From: Shreveport, LA
Yup, she's a PERFECT definition of Borderline Personality Disorder
Symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder
By John M. Grohol, Psy.D.
June 22, 2007
The main feature of borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a pervasive pattern of instability in interpersonal relationships, self-image and emotions. People with borderline personality disorder are also usually very impulsive.
This disorder occurs in most by early adulthood. The instable pattern of interacting with others has persisted for years and is usually closely related to the person’s self-image and early social interactions. The pattern is present in a variety of settings (e.g., not just at work or home) and often is accompanied by a similar lability (fluctuating back and forth, sometimes in a quick manner) in a person’s emotions and feelings. Relationships and the person’s emotion may often be characterized as being shallow.
A person with this disorder will also often exhibit impulsive behaviors and have a majority of the following symptoms:
* Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment
* A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation
* Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self
* Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating)
* Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior
* Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days)
* Chronic feelings of emptiness
* Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights)
* Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms
Details about Borderline Personality Disorder Symptoms
Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment.
The perception of impending separation or rejection, or the loss of external structure, can lead to profound changes in self-image, emotion, thinking and behavior. Someone with borderline personality disorder will be very sensitive to things happening around them in their environment. They experience intense abandonment fears and inappropriate anger, even when faced with a realistic separation or when there are unavoidable changes in plans. For instance, becoming very angry with someone for being a few minutes late or having to cancel a lunch date. People with borderline personality disorder may believ that this abandonment implies that they are “bad.” These abandonment fears are related to an intolerance of being alone and a need to have other people with them. Their frantic efforts to avoid abandonment may include impulsive actions such as self-mutilating or suicidal behaviors.
Unstable and intense relationships.
People with borderline personality disorder may idealize potential caregivers or lovers at the first or second meeting, demand to spend a lot of time together, and share the most intimate details early in a relationship. However, they may switch quickly from idealizing other people to devaluing them, feeling that the other person does not care enough, does not give enough, is not “there” enough. These individuals can empathize with and nurture other people, but only with the expectation that the other person will “be there” in return to meet their own needs on demand. These individuals are prone to sudden and dramatic shifts in their view of others, who may alternately be seen as beneficient supports or as cruelly punitive. Such shifts other reflect disillusionment with a caregiver whose nurturing qualities had been idealized or whose rejection or abandonment is expected.
Identity disturbance.
There are sudden and dramatic shifts in self-image, characterized by shifting goals, values and vocational aspirations. There may be suddent changes in opinions and plans about career, sexual identity, values and types of friends. These individuals may suddenly change from the role of a needy supplicant for help to a righteous avenger of past mistreatment. Although they usually have a self-image that is based on being bad or evil, individuals with borderline personality disorder may at times have feelings that they do not exist at all. Such experiences usually occur in situations in which the individual feels a lack of a meaningful relationship, nurturing and support. These individuals may show worse performance in unstructured work or school situations.
By John M. Grohol, Psy.D.
June 22, 2007
The main feature of borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a pervasive pattern of instability in interpersonal relationships, self-image and emotions. People with borderline personality disorder are also usually very impulsive.
This disorder occurs in most by early adulthood. The instable pattern of interacting with others has persisted for years and is usually closely related to the person’s self-image and early social interactions. The pattern is present in a variety of settings (e.g., not just at work or home) and often is accompanied by a similar lability (fluctuating back and forth, sometimes in a quick manner) in a person’s emotions and feelings. Relationships and the person’s emotion may often be characterized as being shallow.
A person with this disorder will also often exhibit impulsive behaviors and have a majority of the following symptoms:
* Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment
* A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation
* Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self
* Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating)
* Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior
* Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days)
* Chronic feelings of emptiness
* Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights)
* Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms
Details about Borderline Personality Disorder Symptoms
Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment.
The perception of impending separation or rejection, or the loss of external structure, can lead to profound changes in self-image, emotion, thinking and behavior. Someone with borderline personality disorder will be very sensitive to things happening around them in their environment. They experience intense abandonment fears and inappropriate anger, even when faced with a realistic separation or when there are unavoidable changes in plans. For instance, becoming very angry with someone for being a few minutes late or having to cancel a lunch date. People with borderline personality disorder may believ that this abandonment implies that they are “bad.” These abandonment fears are related to an intolerance of being alone and a need to have other people with them. Their frantic efforts to avoid abandonment may include impulsive actions such as self-mutilating or suicidal behaviors.
Unstable and intense relationships.
People with borderline personality disorder may idealize potential caregivers or lovers at the first or second meeting, demand to spend a lot of time together, and share the most intimate details early in a relationship. However, they may switch quickly from idealizing other people to devaluing them, feeling that the other person does not care enough, does not give enough, is not “there” enough. These individuals can empathize with and nurture other people, but only with the expectation that the other person will “be there” in return to meet their own needs on demand. These individuals are prone to sudden and dramatic shifts in their view of others, who may alternately be seen as beneficient supports or as cruelly punitive. Such shifts other reflect disillusionment with a caregiver whose nurturing qualities had been idealized or whose rejection or abandonment is expected.
Identity disturbance.
There are sudden and dramatic shifts in self-image, characterized by shifting goals, values and vocational aspirations. There may be suddent changes in opinions and plans about career, sexual identity, values and types of friends. These individuals may suddenly change from the role of a needy supplicant for help to a righteous avenger of past mistreatment. Although they usually have a self-image that is based on being bad or evil, individuals with borderline personality disorder may at times have feelings that they do not exist at all. Such experiences usually occur in situations in which the individual feels a lack of a meaningful relationship, nurturing and support. These individuals may show worse performance in unstructured work or school situations.
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There's a difference between being there for your kid, and having to live with and deal with her bullpoop.
I dated a girl like that... and oh boy, I was miserable. In fact, she left some scars that are still there to this day... negatively impacting my current (wonderful) relationship with someone who's NOT F'd up. BPD's are very exciting to be with, and they're SUPER loving and supportive when they're "HOT"... but when they're NOT, they would just as soon shoot you as look at you.
I'd break it off with her, and when the kid's a little older, sue for full custody. But, that's just me...
I hope things work out for you... but feel free to continue talking about it here... At least someone can be 100% supportive, even if it's just a few people typing in a text box.
I dated a girl like that... and oh boy, I was miserable. In fact, she left some scars that are still there to this day... negatively impacting my current (wonderful) relationship with someone who's NOT F'd up. BPD's are very exciting to be with, and they're SUPER loving and supportive when they're "HOT"... but when they're NOT, they would just as soon shoot you as look at you.
I'd break it off with her, and when the kid's a little older, sue for full custody. But, that's just me...
I hope things work out for you... but feel free to continue talking about it here... At least someone can be 100% supportive, even if it's just a few people typing in a text box.
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From: 60616
If I was you I would appreciate the fact that she cares enough to even consider something as small as public pictures. At least she wants people to know that you two are together and what not..even if she is overreacting. I mean imagine the opposite. What happens if you posted up some pictures of you and here, then she flips out and complains that she doesnt want anyone to see you and her together in a picture.
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From: Shreveport, LA
RE: Infinite's post,
One could view her incessant NEED to have pictures of the two of them posted as evidence of her Personality Disorder.
What if the original poster just signed off of facebook for good? Often I have thought of it... what would she do? She'd probably end up in a straight jacket under someone like me's care.
One could view her incessant NEED to have pictures of the two of them posted as evidence of her Personality Disorder.
What if the original poster just signed off of facebook for good? Often I have thought of it... what would she do? She'd probably end up in a straight jacket under someone like me's care.
I highly doubt she has a disorder. Any who men will never fully understand a female nor will a female understand a man. Thats life, seems like a lot of females are like that.
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Originally Posted by tuffCookie
^ just for clarification, so you're telling me i should stick around at the moment because she is pregnant?
yea, i don't want my future child to have to grow up in a single parent environment. i haven't gotten engaged let alone married to her because of what i see from her now. her parents were mad that i didn't want to marry yet and told her to get an abortion immediately. but she wanted to keep the baby.
i've talked to her about our relationship and both agreed to try to work things out. right now she's mad cause i haven't moved in with her to take care of her.
don't get me wrong, things were great before it happened which is why i never left. no worries or anything. we were honestly both happy with each other.
yea, i don't want my future child to have to grow up in a single parent environment. i haven't gotten engaged let alone married to her because of what i see from her now. her parents were mad that i didn't want to marry yet and told her to get an abortion immediately. but she wanted to keep the baby.
i've talked to her about our relationship and both agreed to try to work things out. right now she's mad cause i haven't moved in with her to take care of her.
don't get me wrong, things were great before it happened which is why i never left. no worries or anything. we were honestly both happy with each other.
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From: Philly
^ infinitevision, i understand what you're saying. but don't you think her actions are a bit excessive and uncalled for even if she is pregnant? don't get me wrong, women can be crazy and irrational to us men, but the behavior may be perfectly OK to them. even when she's yelling at me, i try not to yell back because i know it'll only escalate the whole emotional intensity level.
senseiturtle:
thanks for the post and support. i read through about BPD and really thought hard that my gf actually might have it. maybe even bipolar?
you seem to be very knowledgeable about this type of stuff. she's talked about going to see a psychologist (or psychiatrist)...i forget which one it was that actually tries to get to the root of the problem whereas the other will usually resort to pills to solve the problem.
anyway, she's mentioned it and i told her i'd go with her. i've been asking myself if i can actually live with this type of behavior the rest of my life let alone the child.
you have to ask yourself would you want to move in and take care of this type of person? but i also think that she wouldn't be acting this bad because she's really mad at me for not moving in with her yet to take care of her.
senseiturtle:
thanks for the post and support. i read through about BPD and really thought hard that my gf actually might have it. maybe even bipolar?
you seem to be very knowledgeable about this type of stuff. she's talked about going to see a psychologist (or psychiatrist)...i forget which one it was that actually tries to get to the root of the problem whereas the other will usually resort to pills to solve the problem.
anyway, she's mentioned it and i told her i'd go with her. i've been asking myself if i can actually live with this type of behavior the rest of my life let alone the child.
you have to ask yourself would you want to move in and take care of this type of person? but i also think that she wouldn't be acting this bad because she's really mad at me for not moving in with her yet to take care of her.
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From: San Diego
I second Kentuc... she does need help. As a girl, I wouldn't blame her for not believing in abortion. However, what is her real reason for not getting an abortion? Every person is different, no offense, but hearing about her personality or how she acts she may have kept the child cause she wants that attachment.
I can be emotion, I can be a major biatch, but I've NEVER met a girl or heard of any girl like her. Yeah some girls do want their space and want time apart, but to give you ____ after... that's when you know they are codependent & it'll be VERY hard to detach yourself whether or not you have a kid.
I agree with everyone & it is common knowledge that any "social" networking online DOES cause break-ups or any HUGE arguments. It IS quite stupid.
As for having a daughter together, as bad as it may sound... you may NEVER know how it'll be until the child is born. You don't know how she'll be around a child. I have a friend use to be married to a mother of four. Two belongs to him and the other two not. However, he treats 3 of 4 children as his own. Either way, the mom is a massive biatch to ALL her kids. CPS has been called on her & nothing much happens. So, I would get on the judges good side now just in case. Cause mothers usually wins the case because they are mothers.
I don't know what else to do or say to help you. I seriously wish you luck. I DO highly suggest that you get her to seek some help. Either way, the way she's acting is NO way safe for anyone. Mood swings can only go so far.
I can be emotion, I can be a major biatch, but I've NEVER met a girl or heard of any girl like her. Yeah some girls do want their space and want time apart, but to give you ____ after... that's when you know they are codependent & it'll be VERY hard to detach yourself whether or not you have a kid.
I agree with everyone & it is common knowledge that any "social" networking online DOES cause break-ups or any HUGE arguments. It IS quite stupid.
As for having a daughter together, as bad as it may sound... you may NEVER know how it'll be until the child is born. You don't know how she'll be around a child. I have a friend use to be married to a mother of four. Two belongs to him and the other two not. However, he treats 3 of 4 children as his own. Either way, the mom is a massive biatch to ALL her kids. CPS has been called on her & nothing much happens. So, I would get on the judges good side now just in case. Cause mothers usually wins the case because they are mothers.
I don't know what else to do or say to help you. I seriously wish you luck. I DO highly suggest that you get her to seek some help. Either way, the way she's acting is NO way safe for anyone. Mood swings can only go so far.
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From: Philly
Originally Posted by TheMerovingian
Don't worry about what her parents think/say BUT don't let her or them know that first of all. You said your parents are ____ed at the situation b/c they can tell what kind of a head case this girl is. I am just going off of what little I know about what you have posted here. If you think she is just acting like this currently b/c of the stress of being pregnant and scared about the future, that is one thing (I AM NOT saying it's justified at all, hear me out) Did she act out with extremes like breaking up with you over simplistic crap before she ended up getting pregnant or is this something that has happened recently? If it was there before, I am sorry to say but it will only get A LOT worse. Nothing you do will ever please her and she will make your life a living hell. Now, if this is a new way she has been acting b/c you haven't moved in with her to "take care of her" then there may be some hope. Only you can make that judgement and decision. Obviously things are getting way too involved really fast. Let her know that. Tell her what happens these next few months need to be thought out rationally so the best can be done for all. Think about things carefully.
well the one time she broke up with me (and now i wish i walked away) before the pregnancy was because my friend asked me to partner up with him to play pool against 2 other friends who happened to be girls. i wasn't doing anything except drinking a beer and chatting it up w/ some friends at the bar. my gf worked at the bar once a week to make extra money. unknown to me at the time, my gf despised/hated/etc one of the girls. later that night, my gf went nuts on me saying i hate that b**** and i can't believe you shot pool with girls (i wasn't flirting with them at all), wtf is wrong with you, etc. she really went off on me and i was COMPLETELY caught off guard.
you know what's funny? she shoots pool with her guy friends when she had breaks. i turned it right back on her and she felt so bad she never did it again.
another incident was when i was driving, she was in passenger seat and my friend in the back of my tC. now i have Tein SS-P's and city roads suck ___. i hit a pothole pretty hard and was concerned i might've caused some damage (bent a rim, alignment, etc). she got mad at me for not asking if she was OK and said my car was more important than her and my friend in the back. needless to say my friend felt awkward as hell even though he said he was fine. then she says well cause you're a guy and i'm a girl. i told her that it wasn't the time and place to argue about something like that especially with my friend in the back. but she didn't care and the night was pretty much ruined from there.
something i find funny though...actually it's beginning to drive me nuts...whenever she wants time apart and explicitly states that she doesn't want any type of communication, she'll get mad later cause she still expects me to text her and check up on her since she's pregnant. then she'll try to give me the guilt trip saying that i don't care about her or the baby.
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OMG. Guys... ALWAYS REMEMBER... girls like to give the guilt trip no matter what the situation is. I HATE it & I don't do it. Girls like that are a waste of time! I feel really bad for you dude. I really do! I hope you find some way to get out of it. Cause if you have problems before, you'll always have problem. A way to get to fix it is to talk to a counselor/therapist together. Like couples therapy? IDK. Again, still trying to help?
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Hey man, all I got to say is hang in there and take a deep breath. Don't kid yourself, you have a lot on your plate. I am not saying I know what the right decision is, I just trust that if you take your time and think it out you will come to it. Times like this that friends always helped me out. Good luck man, I never dealt with something like this but I feel for ya.
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tuff-
I'm glad you see where I'm coming from... Having dated one myself, I would venture to say I sort of know how you feel... in that, those exciting times are so good, that you're willing to put up with the crappy times in the hopes that they'll go away. You stay consistent, always hoping she'll come to her senses, and that she'll have an epiphany and things will be "ok." No matter how crappy she treats you, you're cool with it, because you're partially used to it... and partially overcome with your own feelings, which harden your resolve to continue seeing her through whatever temporary made-up "crisis" she throws your way.
Well... this makes you a noble person... and will give you the experience you need to really make a relationship work down the line. However, you'll come to a point where you'll realize she's not going to change, no matter what. Or, in the case of my ex, she doesn't find you "exciting" anymore, since you're not willing to play the drama game. She cheats on you, to see if she can get away with it. She'll crush you, just to see how you'll react, then come BEGGING you back, nearly to the point of suicide. She'll be 1000% about YOU for about 3 weeks, then start collecting phone numbers at the local bar again.
All the while, acting just like the BPD disorder I've described above. Super HOT/COLD. It's a real disorder stemming from deeply rooted psychological issues. For my ex, it was the fact her dad was never there, consistently cheating on her mom... and her mom attempting suicide, leaving marked memory loss from NSAIDS overdose... then a past relationship that she did this pattern to, leading to overcompensating, etc. etc. Just a downward spiral.
--
Although it's far easier for us to be on the outside and look in (without being tied emotionally)... it's pretty plain as day from my end. I don't mean to sound cold, rude, or disrespectful... but I think you'll find most of the advice given in this thread to be solid.
You have 4 choices. Some are better than others, but choices nonetheless.
1) Pretend nothing's wrong. Don't do anything. Lather, rinse, repeat. Lather, rinse, repeat. If anything changes, it'll be her cheating on you for who-knows-what reason, and it'll end pretty ugly.
2) Drop her completely... pay child support... see the kid on weekends... possibly sue for full custody.
3) Abort the child (which I'd NEVER consider, but it's her/your "choice")... and THEN drop her completely.
4) Take her to a psychologist, who will organize therapy sessions. BPD is NOT an easy fix, and it'll take months if not years of sessions to fix it... but it would be great for both of you, since she works through her issues, and you get the added support of someone who knows how to help.
---
A psychiatrist views mental disorders as chemically derived, and looks for medical reasons and ways to fix it. If hormones are out of whack, or brain cancer is causing personality changes, this is the person to see. He/She can write prescriptions for depression, anxiety, etc.
A psychologist is not a physician (no MD), and approaches mental disorders from a developmental and psyche oriented standpoint. If you were abused as a kid, have these personality disorders, or under a lot of stress... this is the person to see. No prescriptions, though they may refer you to someone who can.
She needs a psychologist right now.
The key thing for you, is to realize that this medical disorder is not unlike any other... Like the common cold, she is simply sick, and needs a treatment. Mental disorders, no matter how severe, shouldn't carry the stigma that they do... The person struggling with the disorder doesn't want to feel this way, and often, they know that they're irrational or screwed up. Many times, their condition is easily curable...
But like obesity, we can't fix it overnight... It will take time and effort. But if you should choose to stick with her, I absolutely insist that you two get help. It will be better for you, better for her, and MUCH MUCH better for your child.
I'll be happy to answer any questions you might have, either here, or on PM.
Best,
-RT
I'm glad you see where I'm coming from... Having dated one myself, I would venture to say I sort of know how you feel... in that, those exciting times are so good, that you're willing to put up with the crappy times in the hopes that they'll go away. You stay consistent, always hoping she'll come to her senses, and that she'll have an epiphany and things will be "ok." No matter how crappy she treats you, you're cool with it, because you're partially used to it... and partially overcome with your own feelings, which harden your resolve to continue seeing her through whatever temporary made-up "crisis" she throws your way.
Well... this makes you a noble person... and will give you the experience you need to really make a relationship work down the line. However, you'll come to a point where you'll realize she's not going to change, no matter what. Or, in the case of my ex, she doesn't find you "exciting" anymore, since you're not willing to play the drama game. She cheats on you, to see if she can get away with it. She'll crush you, just to see how you'll react, then come BEGGING you back, nearly to the point of suicide. She'll be 1000% about YOU for about 3 weeks, then start collecting phone numbers at the local bar again.
All the while, acting just like the BPD disorder I've described above. Super HOT/COLD. It's a real disorder stemming from deeply rooted psychological issues. For my ex, it was the fact her dad was never there, consistently cheating on her mom... and her mom attempting suicide, leaving marked memory loss from NSAIDS overdose... then a past relationship that she did this pattern to, leading to overcompensating, etc. etc. Just a downward spiral.
--
Although it's far easier for us to be on the outside and look in (without being tied emotionally)... it's pretty plain as day from my end. I don't mean to sound cold, rude, or disrespectful... but I think you'll find most of the advice given in this thread to be solid.
You have 4 choices. Some are better than others, but choices nonetheless.
1) Pretend nothing's wrong. Don't do anything. Lather, rinse, repeat. Lather, rinse, repeat. If anything changes, it'll be her cheating on you for who-knows-what reason, and it'll end pretty ugly.
2) Drop her completely... pay child support... see the kid on weekends... possibly sue for full custody.
3) Abort the child (which I'd NEVER consider, but it's her/your "choice")... and THEN drop her completely.
4) Take her to a psychologist, who will organize therapy sessions. BPD is NOT an easy fix, and it'll take months if not years of sessions to fix it... but it would be great for both of you, since she works through her issues, and you get the added support of someone who knows how to help.
---
A psychiatrist views mental disorders as chemically derived, and looks for medical reasons and ways to fix it. If hormones are out of whack, or brain cancer is causing personality changes, this is the person to see. He/She can write prescriptions for depression, anxiety, etc.
A psychologist is not a physician (no MD), and approaches mental disorders from a developmental and psyche oriented standpoint. If you were abused as a kid, have these personality disorders, or under a lot of stress... this is the person to see. No prescriptions, though they may refer you to someone who can.
She needs a psychologist right now.
The key thing for you, is to realize that this medical disorder is not unlike any other... Like the common cold, she is simply sick, and needs a treatment. Mental disorders, no matter how severe, shouldn't carry the stigma that they do... The person struggling with the disorder doesn't want to feel this way, and often, they know that they're irrational or screwed up. Many times, their condition is easily curable...
But like obesity, we can't fix it overnight... It will take time and effort. But if you should choose to stick with her, I absolutely insist that you two get help. It will be better for you, better for her, and MUCH MUCH better for your child.
I'll be happy to answer any questions you might have, either here, or on PM.
Best,
-RT
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car>women.
jk
but seriously, i would have pushed her out of the car for causing a stupid poop argument like that. You've gotta stand up for yourself. A child with an overbearing and possibly crazy parent will not turn out well. when she's acting like a child, tell her.
jk
but seriously, i would have pushed her out of the car for causing a stupid poop argument like that. You've gotta stand up for yourself. A child with an overbearing and possibly crazy parent will not turn out well. when she's acting like a child, tell her.
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Posts: 1,946
From: SJ408-KC816-KS913
man i hope you make the right decision ..i would get rid of the kid i know it sucks but its going to create more of a problem for you down the road////i have 2 kids with my x gf my son is 7 and my doughter is 3, i love them with everything but i was forced to get out of califonia and not see my kids for 2 years ..i did not want to leave my kids but it got that bad ....i now live back in cali and spend as much time with my kids as i can and let me tell you it is so hard... i really cant belive how a girl can be this way.i get harrased everytime i pick up my kids i gettold what i supposed to do is very overwhelming..she even sends msg to my new girls myspace ...my family is not allowed to see my kids and when i do visit my mom i get yelled at by the x for my kids being with me ...trust me you dont need this kind of stress..i highley doubt she will do it becasue as stated she now has a attachment to you ...i can more than gaurentee she will be going after you for everything you got ..good luck ..and if you do have the kid it will no the truth sooner or later so dont worrie ..my son tells me every time he see's me that he is mad at the x because she made daddy go away...