K: How were Katie Holmes' ****?
G: You know the Holocaust?
K: Yeah?
G: Picture the opposite of that!
K: Nice!

 

Harold and Kumar go to White Castle.

New one:

RUN HOME JACK!!!!!

 

Hook

 

Walter: You want a toe? I can get you a toe, believe me. There are ways, Dude. You don't wanna know about it, believe me.

 

and you wanna play good, and... you know... you hope you play good... I think we played pretty good tonight

 

Mrs. Murphy: Help you two?
Elwood: Do you have any white bread ma'am?
Mrs. Murphy: Yeah.
Elwood: I'll have some toasted white bread please.
Mrs. Murphy: You want butter or jam on that, honey?
Elwood: No ma'am, dry.
Jake: Do you have any fried chicken ma'am?
Mrs. Murphy: Best damned chicken in the state.
Jake: Bring me four fried chickens and a Coke.
Mrs. Murphy: You want chicken wings or chicken legs?
Jake: Four fried chickens and a Coke.
Elwood: And some dry white toast please.
Mrs. Murphy: Ya'all want anything to drink with that?
Elwood: No ma'am.
Jake: A Coke.
Mrs. Murphy: Be right back.

 

Bewitched, great scene. "Ah Hell! Damn the Devil! Damn the Devil to Hell!"

 

Blues Brothers?


New Quote:
"Oh yeah... you blend"

 

Not Bewitched, it's from Bedazzled... Liz Hurley is a hot devil....

 

Sorry, meant Bedazzled; they sound too much alike. :S

 

the big lebowski! that was a great movie!

 

YES! My favorite of all!

 

here's an obscure one from the 80's
"so, what, you try and do her or what?......you did!!, thats how come yer face all broke up, i tried to tell you man, but nobody listens to Turtle."

 

^^ North Shore

I'll try mine again, this time I will add more...

"V: What are you wearing?
M: What?
V: You look like a ____in' tourist.
M: Me? What about you?
V: I fit in better than you. At least I'm wearin' cowboy boots.
M: Oh yeah, you blend. "

 

nice, i was sure that i was the only one to remember that "North Shore" quote. i dont know ^^ that one but heres another:

"i can believe my grandma drank all my pot."
"can you get some more?"
"easy pothead, i'll get you yer fix."

 

Ordell Robbie: I got this young nineteen year old country girl named Sheronda. I found her on a bus stop two days outta Georgia, barefoot, country as a chicken coop. I took her to my place in Compton, told her it was Hollywood.

Louis: She believed you?

Ordell Robbie: Hell yeah! To her dumb country ___, Compton is Hollywood; closest she's ever been anyway.

 

Bartleby Gaines: Listen guys, there are plenty of successful people who didn't go to college. Albert Einstein. You know? Pocahontas never went to college. Corey Feldman and Corey Haim; they had a great run. Both Lewis and Clark. Suzanne Somers. Bono.

 

one of my favorites:

Neal: You know everything is not an anecdote. You have to discriminate. You choose things that are funny or mildly amusing or interesting. You're a miracle! Your stories have NONE of that. They're not even amusing ACCIDENTALLY! "Honey, I'd like you to meet Del Griffith, he's got some amusing anecodotes for you. Oh and here's a gun so you can blow your brains out. You'll thank me for it." I could tolerate any insurance seminar. For days I could sit there and listen to them go on and on with a big smile on my face. They'd say, "How can you stand it?" I'd say, "'Cause I've been with Del Griffith. I can take ANYTHING." You know what they'd say? They'd say, "I know what you mean. The shower curtain ring guy. Woah." It's like going on a date with a Chatty Cathy doll. I expect you have a little string on your chest, you know, that I pull out and have to snap back. Except I wouldn't pull it out and snap it back - you would. Agh! Agh! Agh! Agh! And by the way, you know, when you're telling these little stories? Here's a good idea - have a POINT. It makes it SO much more interesting for the listener!

 

Alright, if people aren't going to guess the quotes, then what's the point? I think it should be one quote, then guess... then a new one.

But that's just my opinion. :\

 

sorry i was a little bored this morning and was on a roll...ppl can just quote it if they know it.